Is It Ok to Change My Gender?
Let’s face it, our generation is pretty confused about how to answer that question. It’s a tough one. When you read what’s on the Internet, watch what’s in movies, and listen to the lyrics of many songs, it’s clear that we’ve got a lot of questions about this and we don’t know where to turn for answers.
Look at Facebook. On Facebook, there are 56 options to choose from when it comes to gender¹. These include Agender (no gender), Bigender (both genders), Androgynous (neither male or female, but a separate third gender), Gender Fluid (feel like being male or female at different times), and, my favorite, Other (as if 56 options wasn’t enough to choose from!). If we need this many options to define ourselves, the clear observation is that we’re confused about what it means to be male and female.
"God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them" (Gen 1:27). God intentionally created us as male or female. But sometimes this gets twisted and people begin to think, “Even though I have a man’s body, I feel like a woman. I’m not actually a man, I’m a woman in a man’s body. God must have made a mistake with me.” We call this Gender Dysphoria. This can happen in toddlers and in adults and is a very real struggle. The point of this article is not to judge or point fingers at anyone, but to discuss how we can best love those who struggle with this confusion.
Seek First to Understand
How do people respond to these feeling of confusion? Well, the reaction we hear about the most is Gender Reassignment Surgery. This is a surgery where the organs of a man or woman are surgically converted to the organs of the opposite sex. Many people, such as Bruce (Caitlyn) Jenner, have had this surgery.
There’s also a growing attention in the media on accepting and those struggling with transgender feelings. Many TV shows such as Drop Dead Diva, Orphan Black, The Fosters, and Glee are portraying more and more transgender characters and sending the message to viewers that it is a completely normal and acceptable way to live your life.
The growing media attention has also lead to new laws being passed to promote a transgender lifestyle. In August 2013, California passed laws that allow students from kindergarten up through high school to choose which restroom they feel more comfortable using². So, a high school male can choose to use the women’s locker room if that’s how he identifies and there’s nothing anyone else can do about it. Seattle is another place that has passed similar laws. Just last month there, a man entered a women’s locker room and undressed himself in front of several young girls twice in the same week. Police were not called because he said he identifies as a woman, even though staff members said he showed no signs of transgender identity³. Can you see the problem here? In order to try to seem accepting of anyone’s lifestyle choices and avoid being seen as judgmental, we are willing to put the well-being and dignity of others at risk.
Many parents are deciding to let their child choose what gender they want to identify as at a very young age. An example of this is a young girl named Ryland Whittington. Ryland felt that she was actually a boy in a girl’s body, so between the ages of two and five, her parents helped her transition to living as a boy. Ryland now appears at all kinds of events, promoting transgender awareness. I’m sure that Ryland’s parents chose this out of a desire for their daughter to be happy. But, Gender Dysphoria is the only condition that we allow people to diagnose themselves for. If I go to the doctor and say, “Doc, I’ve got chicken pox and I need antibiotics,” the doctor is going to have to find out if I actually have chicken pox before he does anything about it. It doesn’t matter how convinced I might be that I have the disease. Much less would a doctor be convinced if a two year old came in and told him that!
The Results
Let’s look at a few stats about what has come out of the transgender movement. First of all, 70-80% of children who express transgender feelings completely lose those feelings over time⁴. For those who have a gender reassignment surgery, the suicide rate is 41%, twenty times higher than the national average! There are large groups of people who have the surgery that go on to regret it and wish that they had never made the switch, like this guy, Walt Heyer.
Medical professionals are also shifting their practices due to the negative results. Dr. Paul McHugh, head of the psychiatry department at John Hopkins University, has stopped permitting these surgeries at the university hospital due to their ineffectiveness at helping people; “[Those who underwent surgery] were little changed in their psychological condition. They had much the same problems with relationships, work, and emotions as before. The hope that they would emerge now from their emotional difficulties to flourish psychologically had not been fulfilled.”⁵ Even though the media presents us with all of these people who seem to be living perfectly happy lives after this surgery, the overwhelming result is that many others do not experience the satisfaction they are looking for.
So, what are we called to do as Christians?
Our goal as Christians is to become as much like Jesus as possible so that we are free to love our brothers and sisters just as radically as Jesus did. So, what would Jesus think of this situation?
First of all, Jesus hung out with everyone: Pharisees, tax-collectors, prostitutes, Roman officials, and fisherman. He didn’t discriminate in terms of who he would reach out to. No one was “weird” or “queer” to him. He didn’t just come to hang out with people who had their lives pulled together and didn’t have any issues. He told us, “the Son of Man has come to seek and to save what was lost” (Luke 19:10).
Many people think that Jesus would just want people to be free to do whatever they want as long as they think it will make them happy. But, Jesus doesn’t say that anywhere in Scripture. In fact, he says the opposite. When the Pharisees bring before him a woman who was caught in adultery, Jesus forgives her and tells her that he does not judge her. But, he doesn’t just stop there. His final words to her are “Go and from now on do not sin any more” (John 8:11).
Jesus is not afraid to push us out of our comfort zones. He loves people enough to care for them in their brokenness and then to show them, “This isn’t making you happy. This isn’t good for you. You are made for more!” Jesus would look at a 41% suicide rate and be heart-broken. He would not want his children to be so confused about who they are.
So what can we do? As Christians, we are called to love our struggling brothers and sisters enough to show them that the results aren’t good and that there is a way that leads to a more satisfying happiness. We can come to discover what it means to be a man or woman and live that out with joy. We can walk with our friends and relatives who may be confused about their identity and help them to see that they are loved and that God didn’t make a mistake with them. God intentionally made you a man or a woman and said, “It is very good” (Genesis 1:31). God knit you in your mother’s womb and formed you, not by accident, but with a purpose (Psalm 139).
Above all, we pray for each other. We will not be able to love those around is if we do not pray for the Holy Spirit’s guidance in our life. It might be intimidating to think about how you would even talk to a friend about this topic, but be encouraged by Jesus’ words to his disciples: “When they take you before synagogues and before rulers and authorities, do not worry about how or what your defense will be or about what you are to say. For the holy Spirit will teach you at that moment what you should say.” Trust in Jesus.
For further information:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-9_rxXFu9I
http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2016/02/16376/
http://www.mncc.org/catholic-spirit-transgender-persons-human-dignity-response/
Sources:
¹http://www.slate.com/blogs/lexicon_valley/2014/02/21/gender_facebook_now_has_56_categories_to_choose_from_including_cisgender.html
²http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2013/08/12/new-california-law-allows-kids-confused-about-their-gender-identity-to-choose-restrooms-locker-rooms/
³https://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2016/02/17/man-undresses-in-front-of-girls-in-seattle-locker-room-cites-gender-identity-regulation/
⁴http://newobserveronline.com/transgender-is-a-mental-illness-and-should-be-treated-as-such-former-johns-hopkins-chief-psychiatrist/
⁵http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2016/02/16376/
About the Author
Jake Stanley
I enjoy playing the guitar, the great outdoors, and any sport that involves a ball (except water polo). I firmly believe that Pluto will always be a planet. Jesus completely changed my life when I was in high school so I’m a big fan of His. I strive to be more like Him every day. Follow me on twitter@moderncatholic1.
